New house, new school year and it’s tough all around. Macie will get better but it takes some time. Life with a child with autism is never easy no matter where they are on the spectrum. I don’t feel we are “worse off” than anyone else, we just have a different struggle. Macie is almost 10 years old and is non verbal. My Momma heart knows she will never speak. It’s a very tough pill to swallow. She is so smart, so fun and so loving but her frustration with not being able to speak is difficult for anyone that knows her and interacts with her. She gets angry when we don’t know what she is trying to tell us. She starts to self harm when we don’t get what she needs. As a Mom this is an awful challenge. Your child has a headache, a tummy ache, someone hurt their feelings, etc. A verbal child can vocalize their discomfort. Macie has to work extra hard to communicate her feelings and as her Mom I often feel frustrated, sad, angry, slighted and really pissed off. To be candid, it sucks big time. I don’t get the “Mommy, my tummy hurts. Mommy, I’m hungry. Mommy, I need a hug”. I need to figure this out on my own. Yes, she has a device to communicate, but it’s not immediate communication. She has to turn on her “voice” and make it say what she needs while in distress. I am attaching a video that I just took of her daily struggle. We are working on social stuff and having a conversation. She just wants to lose herself in her iPad. You can see how difficult it is for her to communicate her wants and feelings. Breaks my heart, but we keep pushing. Her pup has helped her tremendously these last few months. He gets her, sometimes more than I do. 😔.
I apparently can’t post the video while blogging from my phone. Stay tuned while I get my laptop powered up. 😡
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